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makes me want to watch this movie .... over and over and over
Drop the Zero. Get with the Hero.

There's no excuse to be skinny!

A simple rule I have had to rearrange my life around
It seemed counterproductive to have a moist chicken.

Why is one of these not about quidditch?
Poor SoJo

2nd to last one.
The New Star of Instagram

sweet lord, my life is now complete.
Cat Wearing a Shark Costume Rides a Roomba Vacuum Round and Round a Kitchen

it's got both your name and the C-train. muchos amore.
Louis C.K. hates the C train

Dammit Rich, I read the comments.

I loved my visit to NC. Other than some bad traffic, we had a fantastic time there.

Why does it seem like North Carolina is just filled with assholes, now?

Not 100% asshole, definitely. But maybe l...
NC upset by NYT article on their crazy government

these things are all over HI. Populations boom and bust - they are prob just working towards their population equilibrium in FL. Or they are going to take over. Which, like, sure.
Now in Florida: Giant African Land Snails

Nice calming electronic guitar on the main page too!

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March.29.2005 : Tuesday
 New Neill Cumpston
Neill reviews "Sin City." I'm happy to have him back.
Link: filling your Pampers Pull-ups with beef stew
» david w  · 10:59  ·  Share comments [3] 
03.23.2005 : Wednesday
 Crash Remix
We provided a link to an educational film from the 70's called "Joyride: An Auto Accident" and asked people to take it apart and edit it however they saw fit. We received dozens of entries and thank everyone who participated.

... Sarah Conner's is amazing.
Link: Pop life
» david w  · 13:28  ·  Share comments [1] 

 House of Cosbys
This is just the best thing ever.
Link: You see.
» david w  · 13:16  ·  Share comments [4] 
03.09.2005 : Wednesday
 Tim And Eric Dot Com
This is my first time stumbling on this site. Really worth some exploration.
Link: Sweet.
» david w  · 13:20  ·  Share comments   
03.02.2005 : Wednesday
 Pranks Hall of Fame
Some amazing stuff here: pranks

I particularly love the Turnpike Prank
» david w  · 13:54  ·  Share comments   
February.24.2005 : Thursday
 'Office Space' with Super Friends
TPS reports.
Link: yeaaahhhhh....
» david w  · 15:30  ·  Share comments [2] 
02.23.2005 : Wednesday
 Monkey Covers
moneys, monkeys, monkeys!
Link: Gorilla's too
» david w  · 09:07  ·  Share comments [1] 
02.07.2005 : Monday
A person makes drawings based on email SPAM subjects.
Link: halarity ensues
» david w  · 16:06  ·  Share comments [2] 
January.28.2005 : Friday
These ads done by a local video game store in NJ are fantastic.. In my most humble opinion...



» david w  · 11:52  ·  Share comments   
01.27.2005 : Thursday
 What! It's a kid's book!
by Sue Hall
Link: what a mess
» david w  · 08:46  ·  Share comments [1] 
01.25.2005 : Tuesday
 Dance Voldo Dance
All movements choreographed insode of Soul Caliber, no extra programming.. Pretty amazing...
Link: so hott!!
» david w  · 11:19  ·  Share comments [1] 

 D&D Sex
"bring out the first piece in true d+d sex: the dice. give them a roll on the end table in the middle of "the act" and yell out "crap! wandering monster!" insist that there's some sort of zombie or orc behind her, and grab a knife or blunt instrument (which you should have placed there beforehand) and pretend to beat the crap out of something. with any luck, your significant other will be weirded out, but view your actions in an endearing light."
Link: Saving Throw
» david w  · 09:35  ·  Share »the sexy comments   
01.20.2005 : Thursday
 Postal Service video
The new Postal Service video is directed by the guy who directed Napoleon Dynamite.
Link: Dang
» david w  · 11:26  ·  Share comments [7] 

 Good Morning!!
Prepare to lose your mind.
Link: Hasselhoff!!
» david w  · 09:01  ·  Share comments [5] 
December.22.2004 : Wednesday
 Screaming At Santa
Happy Holidays Kids!!
Link: ho-ho-hwaaaaahhhh!!
» david w  · 10:03  ·  Share comments   

 Star Wars Christmas
I'm sorry for this, so very sorry. "Everyone will get a cookie / I brought extra for the Wookie."
Link: Christmas in the Stahs!
» david w  · 09:17  ·  Share »Yodas 'n shit comments [2] 
12.21.2004 : Tuesday
 Before John Stewart was on Crossfire, there was Zappa
Amazing stuff.. (taken from Metafilter)
Link: Frank!
» david w  · 13:57  ·  Share comments [2] 
12.13.2004 : Monday
 I read the comics so you don't have to
This site is pretty well done. Nothing beats things taken out of context.
Link: More zippers, mule!
» david w  · 10:24  ·  Share comments   
November.30.2004 : Tuesday
 The future of music...
How does he do it??? McRorie!
Link: Hear me McRoar!
» david w  · 13:54  ·  Share comments [1] 
11.03.2004 : Wednesday
 Build Your Own Batphone
Why do I have the feeling we'll all need one of these real soon?
Link: holy concession batman!
» david w  · 12:01  ·  Share comments   
October.28.2004 : Thursday
 2004's Scariest Halloween Costumes
Scariest costumes for those on the cheap.
Link: Liver.
» david w  · 16:18  ·  Share comments [3] 
10.25.2004 : Monday
 Brilliant. Brilliant. Brilliant.
Triumph in the No Spin Zone
Link: poop: Triumph in the No Spin Zone
» david w  · 10:45  ·  Share comments [3] 
10.21.2004 : Thursday
 Dungeon Majesty
"This is the show where I get ladies to play D&D with me."
Link: Ichhhoorrrr!!!
» david w  · 10:24  ·  Share comments   
10.20.2004 : Wednesday
 The Palaver Omnibus 1999-2004
Ladies and Gentlemen, six years in the making, "The Palaver Omnibus 1999-2004" is hot off the presses!

Featured on this very own happiest of Robots, Palaver is a literary magazine put out by David Willems which collects interesting stories, anecdotes, profiles of friends/relatives, encounters and letters from around the world in bite size chunks. Perfect for a quick read on the bus or subway or waiting for a friend to arrive by hot air balloon in a cornfield in Nebraska.
More details about the book here...

PS: A Palaver Book Release Party will be coming soon, stay tuned for upcoming announcements!!
Link: The Palaver Omnibus 1999-2004
» david w  · 09:04  ·  Share comments [5] 
10.08.2004 : Friday
 Best t-shirts ever.
My dad invented ham.
Link: I nined the sandbox.
» david w  · 11:57  ·  Share comments [6] 

 Jay J. Armes
This is the coolest guy ever.
Link: book 'em hook man
» david w  · 11:43  ·  Share comments [3] 
September.15.2004 : Wednesday
 shameless self-promotion
Introducing the first book by Saragossa Press!
“You will first speak of poles” is a collection of twelve stories, lists, histories and apocrypha written by David Willems and Alexander Rose based on a list composed by Leonardo DaVinci in one of his many notebooks.

It is available exclusively through the following website

The cost is $8.50, which covers the printing of your individual copy. The book is fifty pages long and perfect bound.

PS: Forthcoming from Saragossa Press, “The Best of Palaver: 1999-2004”
Link: you will first speak of poles.
» david w  · 11:55  ·  Share comments [4] 
09.08.2004 : Wednesday
 George Bush sings "Sunday Bloody Sunday"
kinda catchy
Link: wipe those tears away...
» david w  · 13:58  ·  Share comments [3] 
August.25.2004 : Wednesday
 Tricks of the Trade

If you know the length of each of your fingers as well as your handbreadth in centimeters, you can measure the leaves of most plants without having to pull the ruler out of your backpack.

And when doing botanical work in South America, steer clear of the monkeys: They will throw sticks at you with surprising accuracy.
Link: kcilc siht
» david w  · 08:48  ·  Share comments [1] 
08.20.2004 : Friday
 Star Wars Wedding
Good. God.
Link: looks better than the new movies, frankly
» david w  · 09:20  ·  Share »Yodas 'n shit comments [5] 

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