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Seņora Cojones: a different voice in your search for alternatives to nagging quandaries in your life. Pose your question below, and Seņora Cojones will answer it in due time.

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¿As a kid I used to listen to an album that had a song on it called "I'm Morris the Moose." Do you know where I can get a copy of that song?
-Jamie 12/21/2003 6:40:22 PM [link]

Senora Conjones Says...
Dear Jamie:
Ahhhhh the magic of memories, soooo alluring. I used to have a friend that said better not to find the real memories because the remembrances in our hearts was so much richer than any reality. But, on the other hand, you could contact stores that specialize in old records, old music or radio aficionados groups, and lastly the main library has reference sources that might list such things.
Good luck
Senora Cojones

¿what should I get my dad for christmas?
-paige 12/21/2003 6:45:11 PM [link]

Senora Conjones Says...
Dear Paige:
I encourage you to look at the question from another angle, namely: how much do I know about my father that I have no idea as to what to get him ? Gifts often reflect something about our relationship to the person. Without more information on this... perhaps... you should invite your father to a meal or some similar situation that would give you the opportunity to experience a closer look; yet it could open the door to something new (for better or for worse) for the two of you.
Senora Cojones

¿I just saw the movie 'Bowling for Columbine', you know, the Michael Moore anti-gun documentary. Well, he brought up a good point: Canada has a really high number of guns per household, yet the amount of gun related deaths in Canada is a fraction to the number in US. How did this happen? Should we all move to Canada?
-Gary 12/21/2003 6:42:11 PM [link]

Senora Conjones Says...
Dear Gary:
Do you know how expensive movers are ???? How much they break and then tell you it was broken when they picked it up?. To avoid this, are you willing to leave your earthy belongings behind and cross the border to be shot by a disgruntled American in Canada ?.
To my knowledge there have been no statistically proven answers to the differences in our countries.
Canada has a lesser density of population and they have retained more of the old British social traditions making them, possibly, less confrontational. Last but not least though they have a measure of cultural diversity it is not as high as ours. The specific issue of violence in our schools is different from the street violence and related to the lack of adequate training and services in detecting depression in adolescence....sad mark against us.
And you will have to learn French, including all the irregular subjunctives !
Senora Cojones