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post #185
bio: chris
perma-link
11/16/2005
13:30

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Previous Posts
On Sting (and other crap)
Things I Say to My Dad, Because (like myself) He Thinks, Irrationally, He's Going to Die Soon
Why Hipstamatic Was Invented
Happy Mother's Day, Y'all
Black Pear Tree (Guest Post from John Darnielle)
Serendipity






The Honky Free-Form Poetry Theatre and Social Club
I'M YOUR MANATEE

I'm a sea cow, baby
And I got nothin' to do
But try to avoid the motorblades of oncoming boats
Just to get back home to you

Cuz I'm your manatee, baby
The platypus of the sea
I paddle with my stubbies
And make water cloudy when I pee

Cuz I'm your manatee, baby
And I'm hornier than a panda
You're lookin' so good baby
And I know you need a man to

Rock you like a hurricane
Like the stormy Florida sea
But why settle for a man, baby
When you can upgrade to manatee



PETER O'TOOLE

In Dutch my name is Dick Van Dick
I like to drive on the Van Wyck
In my automatic cuz I can't drive stick

Cuz Dick Van Dick don't roll
With the muthafuckers grabbin' the pole



CHRIS MARTIN vs. THE FOUR HORSEMEN

Don't have no worries
Don't need to pray
Fuck the four horseman
Chris Martin is here to save the day

Like a Phoenix from the ashes
Chris Martin will rise
And shout at the horseman
As he stares in their eyes:

"Famine, you're weak
And War, you're a ho!
Pestilence, you gave us a fever
And it was called yellow

Death, you're kind of creepy
But you better play nice
'Cuz I'm Chris Fucking Martin
and I'm Coldplay as Ice"



And I looked, and behold a pale horse:
and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him.
And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the earth
to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.

And it was all yellow.

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Favorite Things
listening
· The World/Inferno Friendship Society