Sometimes a person just needs to know that he or she could run through the village collecting people with lighted torches to follow him or her up that long haunted path to the castle door and light a certain box-wine inferno.
Thanks guys and girls, for being my angry villagers.
This is a description of my new place, where I will be living very soon. The nightmare is over:
"One bright and sunny bedroom available June 1st for gay-friendly (currently one straight roommate, one not) roommate in three bedroom single family home with large back yard in Lyon Village area of Clarendon (Arlington); central air conditioning; shared bath; washer/dryer on-site; five-minute walk to Clarendon (Orange line) metro station, bike path, walking distance to grocery stores (Giant, Whole Foods, Safeway), theatres, and restaurants, Arlington Central Library; street parking is available with permit. Rent is $540/month when there are three housemates, $810/month when there are two; bills that are not included in the rent are Washington Post, phone, gas, electric, water, sewer, trash/recycling, High-speed internet access, DirecTV, and housecleaning supplies, etc.: bills will be split evenly. One month's deposit is required. One largely well-behaved, medium-sized, supposedly hypo-allergenic dog lives in the house; no other pets will be considered at this time. Two, quiet, professional women are living in the house; one very close to thirty, the other in her mid-thirties. We will consider another roommate in his/her late twenties to thirties, professional, responsible, quiet, mature to join us. The house is fully furnished. The room which is not furnished, is neither large nor small; it has one window facing West into a large backyard, and one which faces North. We are looking for someone who is interested in the room to start June 1st."