Today, and in fact lately, I am unable to formulate any kind of semi-ambitious plan for myself. If I did not have the day off I would be at work, which would solve the ambition problem, and the day would end with me in bed with a tension headache and probably no dinner. Since I have a few hours before the tension headache makes normal life unmanageable I am going to cook something.
I will make a simple potato gratin with a layer of sautéed mushrooms or perhaps a cheesecake. Two hours ago I bought all of the ingredients for the cheesecake and then decided that I might want to use a different recipe. Unfortunately, a simple perusal of recipes online shows that cheesecake recipes differ considerably from one another with some calling for as many as five packages of cream cheese. I am not going back to the store. It has been raining for what feels like 2 years but is really only several days.
I am chopping mushrooms, which I find immensely satisfying. They yield to the knife-edge and I think this is what it must feel like to slice through whipped cream. Chopping mushrooms takes almost no effort and the cross sections are so beautiful I wish that I had a microscope to see every beautiful cell. I have chopped too many mushrooms. I use a mandoline to slice my potatoes while listening to news about drug killings in Mexico. I guess that means I am making the potato gratin. Re: cheesecake? The cream cheese is now at room temperature and suitable for mixing. If I do not make the cheesecake today, on my day off, when will I be able to make the cheesecake? I cannot think that far into the future.
At work everyone is always going on about how thinking positive thoughts can solve many of one’s worldly problems. They listen to The Secret on their mp3 players and talk about different motivational speakers. The people at work are triumphant visualizers. They can talk about positive thinking for hours. Sometimes it feels like there is no escape from positive thinking.