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it wasn't a trip like we'd have thought it was a trip.
my mom got in the hospital, and I'm only just now unwinding from the import.
We were to have gone to Florida through macon.
instead, we stayed one night with my talkative stepfather.
(Do you ever sometimes think the Statue of Liberty is outmoded now)
and I was never fully myself until I came "home" and was in my own control hut mode.
but the thought of my mother
gone
it will make me distract myself to oblivion.
yesterday, I took my last holiday from being "poor/frugal" and binged at the local Mexican happy hour. It wasn't very fun. None of it had been hella fun but it had all been important and family. When I returned to SFO, I hardly wanted to leave the aero port. it is one of my favorites and thinking the next time I will be there, I'll be stressed with my cat.
Skinny is the easiest way to being loved/accepted. when I say binge, I mean binge eat. I was kind to myself in advance and gave myself this day off, yet they are almost all the interminable time of me in this one savagely decorated room with an hour a day of sun maybe two soon.
my stepfather offered me a home.
it touched me.
my cat was glad to see me.
she beckons even now.
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