I don't intend to see Attack of the Clones. Instead, I'm going to spend that time training on the ball kicking dummy that I have created in your image.
I don't know if I got the Ball size correct which, as you know, is a crucial element to any ball kicking training. So I am altering my plans ever so slightly. Before I execute my "Kick Matt in the balls" plan, I am going to have to get a plaster cast of your balls.
I'm not sure how I'm going to do this, but I'm pretty sure it's going to involve a beautiful ex-KGB agent named Natasha. If I can't get Natasha for the job, I might have to resort to plan B - which might just be our pal JWL hosting a "Ball Casting" party.
I know what you're thinking, "JWL had a ball casting party last year, and nobody showed up" - and you'd be right. However, marketed properly, not only will this party produce the much needed cast of your balls, but it will also produce a hefty stream of revenue to fund my Ball Kicking training.
You might be wondering why I'm divulging all this information to you. Well, I'm just that good.