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post #369
bio: stu

first post
that week
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Favorite Things
· The Flaming R. Kelly
· Malfatti
· Johnny Cash
· Chuck Klosterman
· Deadwood, Seasons 1 & 2

Previous Posts
Notes on Sobriety
Republicans Are Tough Guys
Brain Fog
Clown Posse
Uber, but For Wrong Numbers
On the Greatest Political Satire of the 21st Century

February Smackdown

Category List
February Smackdown
Literary Shit
Mad Craziness
Random 10


Fighting the Good Fight
Is it wrong to find someone's obvious mental illness so goddamn entertaining? Schizophrenia divorces people from reality, and causes them to find connections that aren't there, and so a schizophrenic's ramblings wind up being like a Salvador Dali painting, or a surrealist movie. It's obviously not so much fun for the person who it's happening to, but it can wind up being terribly entertaining for those of us on the outside of his diseased mind.

That, at least, is the question I deal with when I read about Steve Lightfoot. Lightfoot is the owner and writer of the pamphlet Stephen King Killed John Lennon, which he's been peddling for years, and the accompanying website. Lightfoot's theory is that Stephen King killed John Lennon at Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan's orders, and that every subsequent president has been part of the conspiracy to cover it up.

He points at evidence printed months before Lennon's death about Stephen King that had the phrase "One Great Big Zippo Lighter…Perils of Pyrokinesis" Apparently, Lightfoot has never read Firestarter and knows nothing about the novel or why anyone would talk about pyrokinesis concerning Stephen King. Instead, he breaks down "pyro" and "kinesis" and says that this indicates the killer was firing while he was moving. Also, Stephen King looks like Mark David Chapman, if you reverse the negative and look hard enough. "I reversed the negative because Time reversed it to begin with, three months before the crime."

There's more, of course, but the most entertaining part comes on the footnotes page of his website.

For instance

Barrack Obama, (The Great Deceiver), I have come to learn, is absolutely trying to kill me after first setting the stage with a host of phony traffic tickets to explain away why it was that I was killed in a head on accident with a large truck someday in the future. George Bush did the same thing - minus the pre ticketing - in 2007 when I WAS almost killed when a woman ran a red light doing almost 60 mph.


The day after Hillary Clinton lost to Obama in 2008 she met in D.C. with the Bilteburger family. The one most of you dismiss as just conspiracy theory talk. She lost to Barrack because of a call I made to Rush Limbaugh exposing the fact that Bill secretly met with Stephen King in the White House just ten days before the Oklahoma City bomb went off. That was the end of her surge.

Or even

Barrack Obama IS the establishment president. A deceiver, like Nixon, who I think was pro Soviet to the core in spite of his claims to be a commie hunter.

But also
Israel lost all its legitimacy to build a state based on religion after they bombed Saddam Hussein's nuclear facility just weeks after Lennon was killed, suggesting that THEY may have had Lennon killed just for that reason alone
But anyway
I wish Ron Paul wasn't so far over the deep end with his platform that Americans would vote for him.
Take note, Ron Paul fans. When even a guy who thinks that Stephen King killed Lennon, Bill Clinton helped Stephen King bomb Oklahoma City, and that Nixon was a Soviet sleeper agent thinks your candidate is off the deep end, it's time to give up.

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