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Robot Journal

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post #622
bio: rich

first post
that week

Previous Posts
What the world needs now is a think piece about the pandemic
Music of Teens: K Tel's The Beat
#CocktailRobot: The Per Sempre
#CocktailRobot: The Fitzgerald
#CocktailRobot: The Aviation
#CocktailRobot: The Copper Cocktail

I heart Brooklyn

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Bob Swanson
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February Smackdown
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I heart Brooklyn
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The post about Brooklyn where I use the word "douche bag" five times

Go back to Park Avenue
Once when our pal Joanna was reviewing restaurants for TimeOut, we went up to Harlem for dinner. It was one of those classic, awesome/unusual dinners.
We show up at the restaurant and it's closed.

There are people in there and we tap on the glass and a woman comes out to tell us that someone in the family had died and they had spent all day feeding people at the wake. But then she looked at us and like the mother/grandmother she was invited us in anyway. She was out of a lot of the food, but she made us all full plates and it was all very good and homemade and delicious and left us feeling warm and loved and all that.

On the way back to the train, we passed this little group of teens and one of them yelled, "Go back to Park Avenue".

Which was ironic since we were all living paycheck to paycheck in Brooklyn or the lower east side (before both of those areas became stupid expensive and cool). I wanted to ask him if he could assist us getting a place on Park Avenue. Maybe he knew someone? Someone who had a cheap place to rent?
With a doorman? Huh? Any help?

That was the last time someone told me to go back to where I came from (or wanted to come from).

Mannequins: Freaking me out

Go home white people!
Saturday night we are walking through our neighborhood, the ever attractive and tasty Carroll Gardens. It was a lovely evening. We had a bottle of wine and were headed to a late dinner at the crazy-good pizza place over on Henry.
We approach three (white) people chatting on their stoop. Two men and a woman.
A young boy had just walked by and said hello to them. He was arab-esque.
The young boy continues on his way.

Right as we pass by them we hear the man say to the other two: "You know, the arabs are good people. That kid's family lives next to my father and always checks in on him and takes care of him".

And then louder and towards us: "Not like these white people moving in!"

Holy shit! We were zinged for being white! By a fat-ass white man!

Because we were starving and on our way to dinner (and when they give you a table there, you take it) we didn't stop. Not that we normally would. I don't think.
But all through dinner it bugged me.

I understand this guy's frustration with the changing of his neighborhood. All the Italian folks are disappearing and being replaced by these pesky white kids. Ironic shirts and clever dogs. Fancy baby stollers.
These stupid restaurants and cafes and coffee shops are going up charging stupid money for things. Boutiques for children's clothing on every corner.
Asian fusion everywhere!

I wonder if he's a landlord. If so, I assume he's charging stupid rent. Stupid douchebag rent.
Stupid douchebag rent that drives the old school residents further out and brings in more stupid douchebag messenger bag carrying iPod holding white kids.

Speaking of
Can someone recommend a new bag that isn't a messenger bag so that I can carry my toys to work and not look like every other guy on the train?

When my mom-in-law and her posse were visiting a few weeks back, they went to a church service one morning and hung around afterwards and chatted up the staff and got a tour and all that.
Apparently, all the churches in our neighborhood are losing their congregations. The young kids aren't going to church.

Granted, the neighborhood was (from what I can tell) traditionally catholic and it could just be something with the catholic population decreasing. Nonetheless, the smirking masses don't go to church and so some of the churches are combining to stay afloat - and then the empty churches get turned into apartments with douchebag rents.

So far
White kids don't:
- go to church
- help out that douchebag's father

Change makes things all different I guess.

It's worse living in Bed-Stuy. Or different, at least.

I talk to people in my neighborhood, and have to basically say, "Yes, I am gentrification happening _right now!_ Please, do you think the hipster bar would fit better on this block or the next?"

GIff, however, was told just this week that she is "the favorite white person" in the neighborhood by our local black-guy-sitting-on-the-stoop.
»stu ||  7/9/2007 ||  1:06:33 AM
self hatred?
»v ||  7/9/2007 ||  11:22:22 AM has some great bags, whitey.
»lisa ||  7/9/2007 ||  2:16:51 PM
you might like flat bags.
Made of recycled bike tubes and vintage vinyl.
»eve ||  7/9/2007 ||  8:12:32 PM
I mean, ok, I guess it still looks like a messenger bag...kind of murse-y. Are you thinking about an upgrade to a briefcase?
»eve ||  7/9/2007 ||  8:30:53 PM
flatbags... those are neat.
I hope they don't smell like inner tubes.
»:r ||  7/9/2007 ||  11:06:36 PM
I emailed a link to a Fluevog bag. I think a mean-looking leather type thing that doesn't make you look like a lawyer is your best option.
»jb ||  7/10/2007 ||  10:09:37 AM
my sympathy for these people wanes when i see $2650 rent for a one bedroom on 2nd place, and 850K to buy a 2bdrm, 1 bath FIFTH FLOOR WALK UP on clinton. they are cashing in a-plenty.
»jj ||  7/10/2007 ||  8:31:19 PM
It's not ALL white folks that are all stupid; just the ones who don't realize anyone else exists. The ones who say, "Everyone is going to be at McCarren Pool on Sunday," or "Everyone is getting IPhones," or "Take these beads in exchange for this small island; everyone uses beads." Not everyone. Just stupid white folks.
»blaine ||  7/11/2007 ||  2:21:05 PM
My favorite example, as a Southerner, is all those faux country musicians singing pre-tested and marketed songs about Living in the South and Being a Southerner, forgetting that a huge proportion of Southerners and Southern culture comes from non-white sources.

»blaine ||  7/11/2007 ||  2:23:00 PM
Whenever my conservative white southern relatives bitch about "those people" who expected gov't handouts after Katrina hit, I always ask, "those people? What people? Southerners?"
»blaine ||  7/11/2007 ||  2:25:07 PM
i loves my guv handouts
»pony ||  7/11/2007 ||  6:46:40 PM
the fact people now use the phrase "that white guy" or "white people" (as opposed to "that guy" or "people"- even when they mean the same thing- is not so bad. Oddly enough, I like it. I'm sorry. I'm so white and middle class raised its sickening. But I don't meet those standards. Up with the People! I only know white people trying to be white.
»anne ||  7/12/2007 ||  2:31:00 PM

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