Honey, why are you slowly levitating towards the sky? What?
Oh, this is the second coming or something? Cool! You are ascending to heaven, then? That is awesome.
Can you hold on a second… I’ll grab the cat and join you!
Where’s the cat?
What? It’s hard to hear you since you continue ascending upwards? The cat already ascended to heaven?
Really? Our cat? On her own? That’s pretty amazing.
Well. Let me open a window so I can start to ascend with you. How’d you do this? Do you put your arms up?
What? Say again?
You just started lifting up into the air? You didn’t have to do anything?
Are you sure?
See, I seem to be still stuck here. Yea, I am not moving. Yet. Maybe they do these things in phases? I guess pulling everyone up to heaven at once would be a big undertaking. All at once.
No, I said “big undertaking”.
So, I bet there will be a phase two ascension. I bet that is how they will do it.
I can’t believe those are the shoes you are wearing to ascend to heaven in. No, no. They are comfortable, I’ll give you that, but they look like the New Balances my mother wears.