New  »   Sunshine Jen  ·  Post-Modern Drunkard  ·  Poop Beetle  ·  Robot Journal  ·  Gator Country
«« past   |   future »»
Technological Breakthroughs: Glasses
So I wake up the other day and reach over to put my glasses on. I unfold one side, then unfold the other, but as I'm unfolding the second falls off in my hand!


There's nothing more certain to cast a pall over your day than broken glasses. And in this case there seemed to be no good reason they broke!

A quick check of the hinge revealed it wasn't a missing screw, as it so often is when one of the side pieces comes off. I wish it WAS a missing screw. You just find it or get a new one, and screw it back in and you're in business! But no. Not this time. Somehow the arm had just fallen off. I reached for the good ol' electrical tape and prepared to spend a day looking like a stereotypical dork.

Then it was off to the glasses place to get them fixed.

Or so I thought.

"Hi, I need to get my glasses fixed"

"Let's take a look"

I hand them the glasses. After maybe two seconds she says...

"Oh no. These can't be fixed"


The woman turns to ask a fellow employee something about possibly fixing them, but then she stops herself mid-sentence as she remembers, "Oh right, we don't do parts anymore".

Don't do parts ANYMORE?

"So I take it I'm screwed then"

"Well, um, yes, if you want to put it that way"

"So what are my options?"

"Well, you can get a new pair of glasses and we can have them ready for you by tomorrow"

I still can't get over the notion that my glasses, which I've only had for two years, are un-fixable. It's a hinge, for goodness sake! It's not like they snapped in two or something!

"So basically, my only option is to buy new glasses"


"We can send men to the moon, but we can't re-attach an arm to a pair of glasses?"

"Well, you see, there's a ball bearing and a spring that fell out of there and we don't do replacement parts anymore"

"Anymore, eh? I guess you stopped fixing glasses because it was eating into the profits, eh? If this had happened a day after I bought these, would you be telling me the same thing?"

"You probably had a warranty on them"

"Okay, so if they broke 91 days after I bought them, I'd still be screwed, right?"

No response, save for an uncomfortable shifting and a sort of grunt. I walk out of the store.

So, I haven't tried it yet, but I'm guessing a dab of Superglue will fix my glasses well enough to get 'em working again. But what's the deal with places not fixing glasses anymore? I am now officially older. I'm complaining about stuff like this. Sad, sad. I'm going to go do some exercises now, before my back goes out again.

all comments

post #13
bio: eric w

first post
that week

See more from EricW at
TheWillhelm Features

Category List

«« past   |   future »»