2001:December:10
2001
Ahhhh what a nice Sunday evening. I quite enjoyed topping off the end of a weekend sitting at a friend's house watching a tape of "fambly guy". Just hanging out on a chilly December evening. Sometimes I love tension and activity just because the release of such tension is soooooo nice and fitting. Surprisingly, Eddie's party was really really fun. I felt like an imp again and sloughed off a lot of my adult trappings. I'm tentatively enjoying the new vibrancy that appears to be trickling into our friends and town. Even Mark commented on how our friends/town seem to be coming to life again.
My favorite parts of the party were just being me and having that not seem to FREAK anyone out. It was also really nice in that I wasn't the designated driver on either leg of the journey (mark there - kent back). I've really enjoyed the holiday mentality and have lovingly allowed myself to do whatever I wish. I got invited to so many pot parties. It was quite jubilant. (However, I'm still perfectly willing to imagine that all of wilmington thinks I'm a mean, arrogant freak bitch - lest you think I'm getting airs. In fact, there are many people whom I wouldn't have given any reason to like me - beyond love for humankind. ) For a while, at the beginning, I tried to be very nice and humble for everyone...then later, I'm sure I didn't care. This party, I was very into being 30, the old eternal - do people like me, finding out what makes other people tick, and laughing. It was soooo bizarre to see my old pal Sherry Black. I think it was almost a year ago this year that she and I met in the SAME backyard. Soooo funny. It wasn't really an uncomfortable meeting at all. I merely said hullo and buzzed away. I enjoyed hanging out with friends and not having any tension. If anyone hated me consciously, I wasn't feeling it. I think everyone had a great time. One of my favorite things I did was funny dance during a U2 video. I haven't danced "in public" like that since high school! My favorite scene was when Matt Malloy, Sandy, and Lin and I were in the alleyway, we got a yin to crash a high school party that was happening next door. As in all group activities, there was the instigator (lin), the second (sandy), and the nellies (matt and I). Here we are climbing through a dense winter hedge to a chain link fence. I was valiently trying not to spill my budweiser, and my shoes were so large that I had to basically straddle the fence and gracefully fall into the yard. I was in "foreign territory". It felt gleefully dangerous - just like being a kid. We then made our way into the house. The feeling was that we were just going to walk in and walk out the front door. It WAS SO teenage/early college!!!! I can't really describe it to you, but it was perfect in every detail as being an underage drinkers party - at a college person's first off-campus housing. Clunky, cast-off basement furniture, and no decorations. Kids! I swear to allah that someone said "Those people look like they're 30!" about us as we walked through. Finally on the driveway, sandy got into a little fun. We talked to the drunk kids a bit. Turns out, we were so "old looking" that they thought we were going to bust their party. Bless their sweet hearts - so after Sandy and I tried to shock them with our lesbianism (I was the "man"), I kissed Sandy (my queen's) hand and off we went to rejoin "our" party. I did shout out "happyrobot.NET" to the children, so I do think about you even at parties. Ahhhhh, it was much better to be with the grown-ups, and I was relieved that we had it better after all.
