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post #712
bio: rich
perma-link
4/16/2009
15:35

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A Bear Missive

Normal regular bears
Normal regular bears have had quite a time recently due to the illegal immigration of polar bears across our northern border. These polar bears are bigger and have more enthusiasm and drive and have pushed our normal regular bears out of their normal regular jobs of foraging for berries and/or catching salmon. As the media has reported, the number of normal regular bears who are out of work due to the polar bears sneaking across our northern border and taking their jobs and being more “bear” than our normal regular bears are has increased.


The Issue
The issue is that now you have a whole bunch of normal regular bears that have nothing to do. They are out of work, bored, and frustrated with the whole bear “thing” and we all know that this will lead to these normal regular bears getting into all sorts of trouble.

I am not really against polar bears coming down to the lower 48. I suppose it was bound to happen. I’m just concerned with the displacement of our normal regular bears. What are we expected to do with these normal regular bears? We don’t have the infrastructure to handle the influx nor do we have the training to assist them in their evolution to becoming a new type of bear.


In Conclusion
Normal regular bears: I am here to help you.



Polar bears just take the spots that the previous immigration wave of Panda Bears vacated. You racist.
»stu ||  4/16/2009 ||  3:44:17 PM
Except for the lone sad panda roaming downtown
»mrs. robot ||  url || 4/16/2009 ||  4:33:17 PM
http://gothamist.com/2009/03/26/spotted_sad_panda.php?gallery0Pic=1#gallery
»mrs. robot ||  4/16/2009 ||  4:33:37 PM
Hmmm. I guess the polar bear is pushing the pandas out of work too.
»stu ||  4/16/2009 ||  4:37:12 PM
Those Pandas are so fucking lazy they won't even reproduce, never mind work. You ever get a resume from a Panda? Ever?
»chris ||  4/16/2009 ||  6:27:29 PM
And where is 3pk with a Coaster Bears comment?
»chris ||  4/16/2009 ||  7:46:33 PM
Chris, you're just upset because of that panda bear who gave you the STD.
»stu ||  4/16/2009 ||  7:53:23 PM
And that's part of the reason I can't stand Animal Collective.
»chris ||  4/16/2009 ||  9:00:30 PM



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