I was so angry last night. After going to sleep at 7:45, I awoke at 2am and just seethed. I thought how unfair it was that I care so much and express my caring and you would apparently have me do this on my own.
How strange of me as I haven't heard from you in ages.
I'll do it on my own, but I'm not happy about it. I want to be ringed with caring allies who know how deeply frightened I am, but I suppose I have made my reality this. I get told I'm strong a lot. "Oh you're so strong".
Look, those fucking barking snarling dogs are just a recording that the doorbell makes. I'm terrified and feel that I have messed up my life and have to rebuild all on my own. All this bullshit about writing on this column so that I will be known and loved.