came home for cigarettes and a jacket. stopped short for neko case and a longing for old friends. i am lucky. i have a table at the bar next door. an outdoor irish carved upon table. everyone at it delights in me and is waiting. and they are the best of acquaintances. if i was a little less comparative i would just love the ones i'm with. and not take five more minutes to type right now: why can't it be ginny and blaine and karen and olivia and genoa and dana. i would be thankful. i will leave and try again. because the world is kind, and i owe it my very best, best effort.