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the way i see it: Stop Whining About The Damn SUV's!
I have grown nauseous listening to people whine about SUV's. Every other letter to the editor is some self-righteous prick whining about how selfish and evil SUV drivers are. You've got environmentalists running around putting "I am destroying the planet -- Ask me how!" bumper stickers on the backs of SUV's. And then you have Arianna Huffington and her TV ads portraying SUV owners as supporters of terrorism.
I'm tired of it. I own an SUV and I'm a pretty good guy. I am a fairly liberal guy. I am pro-choice, anti-death penalty, and all for same sex marriages. I am opposed to most things that are morally and ethically wrong. I happen to drive an SUV.
Now, I, like you malcontents, am not very fond of people who don't think about the consequences of their actions. But what I hate even more are the self-righteous, snivelling assholes who have nothing better to do than to get in people's faces about the type of car they drive. Now I'm not going to argue that these types of vehicles, in general, do not get the best gas mileage. But quit your generalizations. That's like saying all Ford Pintos explode when hit from behind.
It's always SUV this and SUV that. What these people have a problem with is not so much the gas mileage, but that these vehicles have been adopted as some kind of status symbol. These are the same people who hated people who wore Polo shirts in the 80's. They think that everyone driving one of these vehicles has no regard for anyone else. Well, most I know have enough regard to not yell at people for what they drive.
I drive an SUV that gets better gas mileage than many regular old cars out there. There are many, many cars that rated worse for the environment. And, you know what, lemon puss? I understand the concept of restraint. I do not get in my car to drive two blocks for a loaf of bread. I drive my car probably fewer minutes a month than most environmentalists spend in the shower. And I'm not driving around following Phil Lesh or driving across the country to riot at the World Economic Forum.
I live in the Northeast. It snows. A lot. Four wheel drive comes in handy. I need storage space and a luggage rack. Why, then, you ask, did I not get a mini-van, or a station wagon? Because I didn't fucking want a fucking mini-van or a goddamn station wagon. And let me tell you something else, you faultfinders. Last time I looked around, there were plenty of other guilty parties in the gas-guzzling category. If we're going to start labelling people as supporters of terrorists, why don't we start with our trucking companies, our movie stars with their stretch limos, our rock stars with their greyhound buses and their 18 wheelers, our oil-heated homes, and the thousands of lame-ass Chevy van-driving indie rock bands? Go bother Aerosmith, Gwenyth Paltrow, Roadway Express, and Deathcab For Cutie and leave me the fuck alone.
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