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03
16
05
Cleaning out the Closet (LES or Midtown)


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If you'd rather read it there for the full effect, at least for ten days, it's here.

Cleaning out the Closet (LES or Midtown)
Reply to: your anonymous craigslist address
Date: 2005-03-16, 11:52AM EST



I've had a box of excess junk in my closet for years now, and on top of the box is the original Bondi blue iMac. Remember the late 90s? It was such a good time. If you'd like to revisit 1998 or 1999 (as I did when I bought it new in 2000), then take the iMac. I have all its originals, and will wipe the drive and include all the CDs. I'll take $75 and even walk it to the door of my building for you. If you're starting a design museum, or simply want something that'll run your bootleg Final Draft 5, Quicken 2000, or Dinotopia, then this iMac is your iMac.

In the box beneath the iMac are all manner of devices, including something I was incredibly excited about back in 1997, a Jaz drive!!! (SCSI) with two 1-gig disks. I'll give you this for anything by Ralph Stanley and His Clinch Mountain Boys or The Stanley Brothers, preferably on CD, but will consider a cassette or 8-track (if the 8-track player is included). I have its working, but frayed, Parallel to SCSI cable (and, just as with all else listed, all the original crap). I can't believe I paid 500 dollars for it just to have some place to store that single Adobe Premiere project I made after I saw all that video art at the Whitney Biennial.

I also have a Zip drive (SCSI), and a heap or disks. However, the power adapter is fried. I tested it at my office so I know the drive works. If perhaps, you are a set designer and need to make an accurate looking desk for a play or movie about some failed dot-com in the go go late-90s, please take the drive and let me know how many zip disks you'd like, and in return you'll hand my unrepped screenplay to your producer or agent. Or if you somehow have an adapter and need a Zip drive, give me 10 dollars and 27 cents or a ticket to any Sunday afternoon movie at the Sunshine Cinema.

I have two ADB Global Village modems at the bottom of the box somewhere. (Remember modems--they connected everybody to the Internets). One is a 56k, the other a 28.8, and they look exactly alike. If you are some sort of prize-obsessed person with fifty phone lines all rigged from your slew of Quadras to repeatedly call radio stations until you win that cruise to Bermuda, then take the modems. Give me 5 dollars for both, or 7 dollars if you make me figure out which is the 56k. And yes, I still have the CDs and disks and whatever else came with them.

Oh, there's so much more. There's a Panasonic cordless telephone I'll trade for a Goldenberg's Peanut Chew candy bar. (Also a bigass Sony portable handset from 1994--fun to walk around town with and pretend to talk on, as I threw out the base station). I think I have a dozen or so ethernet cables you can have for a bag of licorice jelly beans. I have a 32 MB RAM card for a G3 iMac or Powerbook that I'll trade for an unopened can of tennis balls.

Assorted cables: SCSI, Serial, Parallel, ADB, phone, power cables to things I've forgotten the names of, and the AC adapter for every radio, answering machine, and shearing scissors I've ever owned. If you're a shepherd, and need the right power adapter so you can make next years wool sweaters, I'm your man. Or I'll gladly trade a grocery bag of cables for an unopened bag of cotton gym socks.

I also have some piece-of-crap computer speakers from China by way of Wal-mart circa 1994 I'd be willing to leave on your stoop, ring the buzzer, then run away.

There's a MacAlly USB trackball mouse you can have for a copy of your prom picture, or 2 bucks. An ADB mouse and keyboard from my first Mac is yours for a photo of a Springer Spaniel puppy.

And last, a Mac SE--1MB RAM w/800k disk drive, painted solid blue, signed by the artist, for $1700. Makes a great lamp.

I'm also looking for a time machine to take me back four years or so to when I should have sold this stuff.

There are surely more odds and ends, and yes, I'm serious.


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post #59
bio: john ball
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3/16/2005
12:09

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