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about joy
My new directive? At all costs, everything must contain at least some joy.

I am having a midsummer epiphany, feeling itchy about all the things I have been putting off doing. Craving a shakeup.

Things were different at 25, when I would tolerate darkness just for the sake of experience. But as much as am getting stronger and wiser with age, I can tolerate darkness less and less.

I know that I used to want to do and be a lot of things before I started doing the job thing. I guess I got all freaked out after university when it was hard to find work. I was so relieved to find a job, I put a lot of my expectations in my pocket. And now? My old dreams don't match up, but my current reality doesn't really cut it. More joy, I say.

What are all the things you promised you'd be?

After 3 months of celibacy, I took the opposite approach. And it wasn't the magic pill. Fancy that. Not nearly enough joy.

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7.15.2002
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post #298
bio: adina
perma-link
7/15/2002
09:38

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