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Reasons why relatives are so much more enjoyable with marijuana (thanks, C!):
1) The cake is not dry at all, but elixir of the gods.
2)The family cat's compulsive grooming is a fascinating escape from a conversation dealing private health insurance.
4) Cats make me itchy.
3)It is suddenly funny that everyone in your family talks low, out of the side of their mouths, using plenty of air quotes when they talk about "homosexuals". It is like, after years of knowing of their existence, they still somehow expect being gay to involve cross dressing and bedroom farce.
5)You actually have the strength of heart to formulate a non-standard answer to the question you have been asked 100 times.
6)Cats are funny.
7) Sure, I'd love more cake.
8) The meningitis belt of Africa sounds like a fashion accessory.
9) Sometimes, cats jump on your lap and stare at you like they are judging you. You do not need to tell your relatives you are thinking that, though.
10) Didn't you guys used to have dogs? I remember those dogs. When did you switch species?
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9.24.2002
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