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post #153
bio: stu

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· The Flaming R. Kelly
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· Chuck Klosterman
· Deadwood, Seasons 1 & 2

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Notes on a Pandemic
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Republicans Are Tough Guys
Brain Fog
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Uber, but For Wrong Numbers

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Dubya and the Olive Garden

Take this poll!

Is Bush a Good Leader?

It'll make a difference! Really!

And if you do, you can get a free dinner! For two! You and your loved one!



You'll love it. It's a great place. You'll love the breadsticks.

You'll love it! Try the minestrone. And the breadsticks. Oh, you'll love the breadsticks.

Yes, of course we're talking about the Olive Garden! You guessed it! Their reputation preceeds them! The breadsticks! As famous as Hooter's buffalo wings.

You'll love it!

No, seriously, you'll love it!

Come back!


Step right up and take this poll.

Have you stopped beating your wife...
As if this were a real poll anyway--the advertising mirror image of a push poll, except instead of trying to get out rumors and misinformation about your opponent, they're using rumors and misinformation to get your email address. Pay no attention to the massive uptick in spam behind the curtain!

I bet this Olive Garden promotion has heavily tipped the poll in Bush's favor. Yes, you heard it here first. Bush supporters also support crappy chain restaurants. To be fair, non-Bush supporters also support crappy chain restaurants, from time to time. I grew up with The Olive Garden being the "nice" restaurant. It's where we went to celebrate things in Fargo. Birthdays, graduations, things like that. What the hell was wrong with us? Seriously?

Other than living in Fargo, North Dakota, that is.

I'm stunted, though--I have an irrational paranoia now about going into restaurants and not knowing already what's on the menu. Thankfully, it's very lowkey, so I'm actually capable of stepping into, say, Nobu, without curling up into the fetal position. But it's still there, and there's always a feeling of adventure when I step into a non-chain restaurant or a non-diner and sit down with a virgin menu on the table (*ahem*. That is, a menu I haven't ever looked at before, not a menu with which to choose which virgin to order).

Eventually, I might become a real grown-up. Until then, it takes effort.

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