 |
|
|
|
|
|||||||||||||||
|
|||||||||||||||
|
|
The Big News
Yea, yea - this has been a slow train coming. Mrs. Robot and I have big news as well. There comes a time in every couple's life where they think, "We love each other so much and have so much love to give - we should think about having children and giving them some of that love. The love that we have in spades, that is." We do have a lot of love to give and have a history of celebrating life and giving it love. Remember the baby spiders we had on our ceiling a few years back? They were so cute when I wasn't squashing them. Remember when we babied our cat and took photos of it and talked to it like a baby? Well, actually, we still do that. Remember how lovingly we fed the turtle doves all through the winter last year? How every morning they would wake us with their cooing outside our window? Well, the robots have a new mouth to feed. Her name is Skeeto and we smother her with our love - or try to. Skeeto has been feasting on our love for the past two nights. Buzzing in our ears, biting us on our faces as we sleep, drinking our blood, and leaving her distinctive little marks all over our epidermis. Begs the question  Why do we have mosquitoes in our bedroom?! I threw out those water filled tires and the old baby pool that were in the living room.I cleaned up all the watermelon rinds on my bedside table (skeeters love those apparently). The fish tank full of blood has been covered. Is Brooklyn now some sort of disease-riddled rain forest? Is that jungle rot outside my window? Well, it's obvious, dumb ass You smushed all those baby spiders a few years back. Those baby spiders I bet would of grown up to eat skeeters, and then had babies of their own who would eat skeeters and so on and so on. Don't smush spiders! Even if there are like 100 of them on your ceiling. With a newborn, it's hard to sleep It was 1am last night and I am sitting in bed with the lights on staring at the walls and ceilings (not that unusual, actually) looking for Skeeto who had just buzzed me as I was reading. All I want to do is talk to her, but whenever I see her on the wall, she will suddenly fly away and hide. MattyJ, does Sydney make you stay awake staring at the walls sometimes? Speaking of babies  Congrats to fellow roboter Eric (w) who went and knocked up his lovely wife Reba. My list of names for the baby Haggisboy Lumpy Marla Han Slacks Fantastic Dan Taco Bubbletastic Jumbles Spermy Lance Peng Tanny Angel straight from heaven Cobra Stang Rebecca Jr. Cheese Huevos Fonz Quoted from Eric And to answer the usual audience questions;
|
