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Robot Journal

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post #480
bio: rich

first post
that week

Previous Posts
What the world needs now is a think piece about the pandemic
Music of Teens: K Tel's The Beat
#CocktailRobot: The Per Sempre
#CocktailRobot: The Fitzgerald
#CocktailRobot: The Aviation
#CocktailRobot: The Copper Cocktail

Category List
Apartment Buying in NYC
Bob Swanson
Election 2004
February Smackdown
Food and Drink!
Group Topics
I heart Brooklyn
Lists of things
Out of Context SMS
Rejected Love Stinks stories
Site News
Snap Wrap
Things I've Owned
This I believe

I have your deductions right here

Happy Tax Day Peasants!
When you run a global venture like happyrobot, taxes become a huge endeavor.
Three things in no order I wrote off on my taxes this year
1. Helicopter
2. Mistress
3. Waxing

Remember writing checks?
The other night I had to write the check to the IRS. Remember writing checks?
Or, as you non-yanks would say "cheques"?
(pronounced "Check-Ques")
Spelling out amounts. How quaint. How pleasant.
Look at my signature.

Dear Vatican
I am open for consideration as your next The Pope.

You there! Lick my head! Please!
You're single. Is that the cool thing to do now? Lick people on the head?
No. Their head head. The one with the eyes and booger nose and hair and ears.
Granted, it's all screwed up, but there is one kid out there who can now say, "Michael Jackson licked my head".
No, my head head.

Groin Bitingly Crazy
That Bravo show about the dog-crazy people. What's it called? "Dog Crazy People"?
Do people like this show? Is it because I actually know "dog people" that makes me yawn and say, "seen it"?

One redeeming quality
one un-redeeming quality
about this show.

Redeems: I saw a re-run the other night. There was a crazy woman who had a dog that bit people. She was not "Crazy, part of the show" but more like "Crazy wandered into the range of the camera".
So, yea. Her dog bites people in groin. Constantly.
They are interviewing her and she is hysterically talking about how her dog has bit her on her vagina numerous times.
Not groin. Not crotch. Not thigh.
Vagina. She says this like 100 times in a minute.
(at this point I turned to Mrs. Robot and stated that this was officially "knee-slapping" good)

Crazy lady then mentions that the man that her dog just bit on the thigh... well, he was going for his penis.
Somehow this was all meant to defend her dog's behavior.

Un-Redeems: Doughy dramatic gay men.

Every time I say "crazy" Drink!

Qi / Chi
I apologize ahead of time here, but if you start discussing your "Chi", my kneejerk is to roll my eyes. Sorry.
Nothing personal.

Dorf and I cannot stop saying "the dog bite me on the vagina" and "I don't want him to bite the labrador on the penis." Even when we're trying to explain to the mechanic what's wrong with the car.
»3pk ||  4/15/2005 ||  8:57:30 AM
»chris ||  4/15/2005 ||  9:33:15 AM
I don't want him to bite the labrador on the penis!
»dorf ||  4/15/2005 ||  9:33:57 AM
my dick is killing me
»the labrador ||  4/15/2005 ||  9:41:35 AM

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