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"Orangie just killed a tiny bird, and I cried. there's no one I can tell about it. No one that even cares or would know who he was"
"what about Larry?"
"oh, I'm not going to entertain that connection anymore. It's too loaded."
"well, we definitely have a type: insecure drunk men who are super intelligent and compensate for their mother issues with teflon arrogance."
"like our father I guess."
"at least you married a millionaire. I married a fucking loser."
"well, your first husband was really nice."
"yeah, and I got bored with it and left him for an arrogant insecure man who liked his compensating drugs."
"that's true."
"and then I married someone who wasn't even smart. I just thought that anyone who went to MIT and was an architect has to be smart."
"you've heard the maxim, even a 'c-student' graduates."
Her sister added, "besides, it's best to love yourself and be ok not needing anyone."
Kristen fucking laughed, "is that why you've never in your life dumped someone without having another one on the string. I mocked you when I was a kid - clocking you as so obvious. All of the women really - wanting to be skinny so badly you'd acid out your teeth with vomit - believing that your looks are the only reason anyone would stay - and chasing money or security. I turned out to be just like you. I'm just embarrassed by it, and alone."
"wow, that's really shitty to say."
"we're sisters. no one else could say it to you."
"well, don't I feel honored. You know you're not really that smart."
"that's so sweet of you to say. Please just take away the one thing I cling to. you haven't won enough of the prizes huh."
"oh, you're fine. just welcome to earth and stop being so above us all."
"Merri, I'm so lost. all I did was look at all of you and think what shallow fools you all were, and I'm the arrogant drunk bitch alone."
"well, you said the fat drugs helped you not drink."
"yeah, but it's not me. it's a crutch. and wow, I'm surprised you remember that. it feels like no one really thinks about me - just more whether I'll be disruptive."
"we love you. we don't like you."
"I wish I were part of that we."
"remember when I told you you were adopted?"
Kristen did. She remembered being in the back of the family station wagon wishing it were true more than anything - that she had a real family that loved her and wasn't fucking insane and fighting and angry and crying and dramatic all the time. she wished hard that she was a princess secretly and was thrust into this family to hide.
"yeah."
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