the first time was at the Chateau Briontee, located in the Britany region of France (which is the closest to England). It's an absolutely gorgeous chateau-hotel, surrounded by acres of hunting-forest and gardens...and unfortunately, it had only one bathroom in the whole hotel. For everyone. If you were out hiking in the woods, as I was (and I must've been six or seven years old), you were doomed if you had to "go" after a 40-minute walk. There was basically no hope. So one time, my two sisters and I were out exploring the grounds, and I really had to pee (I guess it was all the Orangina I had drunk or something like that), and so after much debate we decided that I should go behind a bunch of brush, while my two sisters kept a lookout. I was petrified, but I had just gotten ready to go when this hunter and his dogs come bounding across the field too quickly for my sisters to give warning...that was a bit traumatizing.
the second time was when I was on Watershed Wisdom, and we were hiking across the Kettle Moraine forest for the whole day while carrying heavy packs. After consuming much water, I finally had to succumb to the "call of nature", and since we were really -out in- nature, my hiking buddy Olga had to walk around the next hill while I had to balance precariously on the side. Another scary one, since I had to avoid poison ivy and ticks. eeep.
The best bathrooms i have ever been in were the bathrooms at Harrods department store in London, where you have to pay a pound and fifty pence merely to go in, and the bathrooms at Castel Sant'Angelo in Rome. Both had gold-plated faucets, marble floors, the works (especially Harrods, where you can spray yourself with an extensive selection of expensive perfume offered by the white-gloved attendant).
Worst bathrooms were probably in Paris. I remember this through the misty fogs of time that a lot of Parisian cafes didn't believe in "indoor plumbing" even in the early 90's--lots of turkish toilets. Euuugh.
I saw a scorpion in the bathroom at my Italian grandparent's house back in the early 90's, when they still lived on the gorgeous farm called 'La Podere.' That was quite startling.