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She was stunned into submission.
The smile could not be wiped off her face.
And she wondered what would happen when the shoes started falling from the sky.
She grabbed the ball and ran away to her inner sanctuary - whatever that was. Her hair continued to look like Richard lewis. She always seemed to age more every day. Last night they had consumed aged steak and shared it.
"wow, did you just compliment me?"
"is that so shocking. I compliment you a lot."
"honestly, I do not recall a single compliment you've given me."
This was their fourth adult drink. He had a martini. She has a pinot noir.
Before he had come, she had convinced herself that she was in limerence and to dial it the mother fuck down down down. He arrived at her door after leaving from her door. They did not kiss. They did not hug. They danced. Or rather she hot footed from side to side. She had worried that she'd be so tired she couldn't even be good company. Instead, she lit up like a girl in love - a crone in love.
She played the worst game of pool since maybe the first one. Her sister's first husband - the one who later hung himself for his son to find - taught her how to play. She only knew how to make direct shots. At one point, she used a ball other than the cue ball to hit. She was definitely off her game.
She didn't really feel cute at all, but she was there. She was going to play until the end.
"I think it's a compliment that I'm present."
she laughed.
"well, that is the one thing I grasp at - that you drive all this way to seem me consistently. That's the only proof I really have."
"how about this? I have to run an errand related to my mom in Alabama. It's the weekend before Labor Day. Would you like to come with me?"
She metaphorically dropped her fork mid bite.
"sure."
"I mean. I could fly, but if you go with me, we could drive. I'd let you pick out the place. You could research."
"ok."
"you'd have to get days off at work."
"I can do that."
He was nervous and they talked about how travel was a test - you either can't stand the person or you get to know you're able to travel together - with the biology of digestion and real shit.
It baffled her. In the best way...
It turned into the next day. She continued the tradition of giving him things. He pretty much wigged the fuck out when she gave him the pressed flowers from his mother's funeral bouquet.
"that is so weird. get those away from me. I am weirded out by that."
She panicked a little bit but later thought if he didn't see her gesture as thoughtful - well, good to know now. She was looking at the daisy as she typed. It was truly hers now, and could be the memento of the last flowers she gets from him. She babbled to cover her error.
"you know, I am one of those girls. I hate getting flowers. It's just work to me. You have to deal with the water and monitor their slow deaths. I only really like flowers I pick myself - or get myself. For some reason, I just always state I don't like getting flowers. It's a gesture that's uncomfortable to me, but I thought this was the last bouquet you'd ever get in your life, so I wanted to not just throw them away."
"yeah, well. It's just freaky."
"OK. they're mine now."
Perhaps she would always treasure this moment. Perhaps it was the last time she too would ever get flowers. She had grabbed his ball in comfort the entire time.
"why don't you just stop watering your plant then... if you overwater them so much they're dying."
"Oh, I never thought of that. Of course I'm not watering them anymore, but they are the slowest of adapters."
It was better and better every time.
"I can predict the future."
"well, I'm not going to ask."
Without risk, what is life.
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