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she got off the phone talking to a friend she hadn't spoken to in three years. They picked up exactly where they left off.
The friend was a hot shot in a big San Fran corporation who used to work with narcissi. The thing narcissi like the best was the Amsterdam connection. In fact, she was considering perhaps trading Ireland for Amsterdam, but that was a story for another day.
She was tipsy. It was Friday. It was happy hour, so she texted the asshole she fell in love with to see if he might actually go "what the fuck, I do want to talk to you" but instead it was silence. She even taunted him, "for fuck's sake, it's a cliche that you don't talk to me. that's your type."
She knew that because the friend and she had immediately gone to the most important thing:
love.
after a bit of rambling, she asked "so how are you really?"
"Oh, I'm fucking bereft. have you ever heard to attachment style? an avoidant just dumped me or I dumped him. I can't tell."
Her friend squealed. "what a coincidence! I just finished reading attached a few days ago. You're anxious attached."
Narcissi laughed. "you don't have to tell me, but as you know, I like to pretend I'm avoidant. I'm so jealous of you."
Shay answered, "you know I'm avoidant."
Narcissi replied, "that totally tracks. but I also see anxious."
It was like astrological signs or Myers-briggs. Humans so want to know.
They chatted more and narcissi finally asked the question she cared about the most.
"So, shay, you're avoidant. how do I get this guy back? I love him so much and haven't et anyone like him in years, but he's so fucking frustrating and has ghosted me cold."
Shay answered, "well, the smartest thing would have been what your sister suggested, to leave him in the cold and play him off other men."
Narcissi groaned, "you know I can sooner do that than pretend I'm a muskrat."
Shay answered, "but it's the only way. the more you chase us, the more we think you're idiots. I have never dated an anxious attached person."
Narcissi countered, "but have you ever dated anyone secure?"
"nope. so far, just other avoidance."
It had been decades. Her friend didn't see she was just the same as always.
but narcissi probably was too.
"I'm so glad I'm done with Andrew though. he sucked."
"He was probably avoidant."
and breathing happened.
"if you're ever in Atlanta again. look me up."
"you know I will."
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