The Layyyyy Kers
I am not a big time basketball fan. In June, I'd rather be watching baseball, but here in LA, you can't ignore the Lakers. Sure, the National League West is a seesaw between the Dodgers and the Padres. Sure, the Angels' bench kicks ass, and now with Vladimir Guerrero, the Angels are really fun to watch. But right now, all sports talk circles back to the Lakers. The Lakers are in the finals. The Lakers are playing Detroit. The Lakers are down 3 games to 1 to Detroit in a seven game series. The Lakers have big egos while the Pistons play like a team. Larry Brown deserves to win a championship while Phil Jackson has won enough.
The Lakers. The Lakers. The Lakers. Yellow and purple everywhere. Jack Nicholson in courtside seats. Yellow and purple. Yellow---like the color of the sun. Purple---well, it's royalty. You can get away with yellow and purple team colors in LA---the light is different out here.
This morning, I found myself writing a letter to Phil Jackson, the coach of the Lakers. You might remember Phil Jackson as that guy who was the coach of the Bulls when they were a dynasty. Well, now he's in LA---trying to work his Jedi Master Force on the Lakers. I really don't have any great advice to give to Phil Jackson. I just like writing letters.
Dear Phil Jackson,
Lately, you have been looking mighty uncomfortable in your suit and tie during games. Is the air conditioning on too high or is it the Piston defense?
They're shutting you down, Phil. You have some of the greatest players in basketball. Right now, they just look baffled and at times, downright bad. They're too rich to be that bad, Phil.
You probably haven't seen this, Phil, because you've been at all the games, but all over Los Angeles and Southern California, grown men stand transfixed by their television screens. Reality falls away from them as they stand there (or sit there) watching, waiting, hoping. They know. They know, Phil. They all know.
LA is the mighty giant. Detroit is the underdog. Well, it's time to wake up the giant. It's time to light the fire. It's time to do all those Hollywood movie cliches that happen in a montage sequence in the third act while a Kenny Loggins song plays in the background.
You can do it Phil. You can win Game 5, and then Game 6, and then Game 7. You will not go gently into that good night. You will play on!
But if you lose, that's okay by me because I'm in baseball season right now.
The Lakers lost 100-87. Uuuuu, it was bad. Somewhere around the 3rd quarter they decided to just go home, and the Pistons just kept playing. It reminded of gym class basketball when half the class didn't care at all and wanted to just get out of their polyester shorts.