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post #119
bio: jen
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10/17/2005
17:11

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Thought I'd Leave This World by 21


Victoria, this is for you . . .

When I turned twenty-one, I felt so old like I was really really wise because I was in school and there was so much stuff going on and I was totally crazed with so much work and ambition and stuff because there was stuff happening all around me all the time. And I worked in the dance department too.

When I turned twenty-one, on the exact day that I turned twenty-one, I did not drink because I had been drinking illegally for years and I had a very important screenplay to write for my screenwriting class and I had to get it done and I was gonna get it done and I think I got it done. Now, I can't remember what it was about. I think it had something to do with an elephant.

At twenty-one, I thought elephants were cool.

When I turned twenty-one, I decided to dye my hair blonde and my roommate Danielle helped me put the light ash blonde in my hair. At first it stung but then it was okay and got a little sticky before I washed it out with the enclosed conditioner. Why do they give you such a small amount of conditioner anyway? Too much for a single rinse and too little for a second rinse.

When I was twenty-two and in London, I had to keep the blonde hair dye in my hair for twelve hours because the water went out in the house I was staying in so I couldn't rinse out. I went to a 4th of July booze cruise on the Thames with hair dye in my hair under a cotton baseball cap. I called my Mom at 6am her time, but she was awake. She's a morning person. And a guy I totally dug was there, and he had American Marlboro lights, and I bummed a few off him because the English Marlboro lights were total crap.

When I was twenty-one, everything was so serious and new and exciting, and I was a bright young thing and a phenom or I was going to be a phenom. I slept curled up in the phenom. I dreamed of the phenom and ignored too much else.

Would I ever want to be twenty-one again? No fucking way.

The cool thing about turning twenty-one and being able to drink legally and all that baloney is that they don't take away the legal drink at twenty-two or twenty-three or twenty-six. So, DON'T WORRY.

I hate all-caps, but those were necessary.

And Chris and Stu are not assholes. Their road trip entertained me this morning. I love it! They pretended to drive through Cleveland. Come on, that's funny shit.

And does anyone know what Tanya Donelly is up to these days? When I was twenty-two, I thought Star was an amazing CD. Remember Belly?


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