A few months back, I joined a new gym. This is not cause for major upheaval in my world. However, lately, the gym has been inspiring some random thoughts as I work out.
What's the deal with the trainer guys shaving their legs? I know it's probably an athlete thing and their legs do look smooth. However, their legs look way too smooth. I wonder if they got them waxed.
Girls who only wear training bras on the top half to just work out are just plain obnoxious. Yes, we can all see your abs, Miss Thang. This is what I use to think until I got Gatorade on my tank top and had to work out with (yep) just the training bra. I did feel kind of like Xena.
I bought a new pair of sweatpants to work out in at Target. I tried them on. They looked really cute. Unfortunately in the gym, they are completely useless for me. Because they just hang on my hips, I keep thinking they are going to fall off. My sweat pants made me tense.
When I first joined up again, I really felt old, very old. I didn't have the energy or consistency I once had. Old injuries were catching up with me. I was old. Now, I'm doing better. The old strength is coming back. It's like the body knows what it has to do and does it.
Yes, I think it's time for me to throw away the CD player and upgrade to an mp3/ipod thingie. I can do it. I can embrace the new technology.
Ladies, it's okay to increase the weights you use. Your arms won't get big like the Hulk---unless you take steroids.
Yeah, I like it when I have to ask a guy if he's done with the thirty pound dumbbells, so I can do a set. Shit yeah, I'm that strong.
I still find it amazing that people can work out in a gym and not sweat. That is just so wrong to me.
I recently saw a trainer count to twenty. Usually, they only count to fifteen. For example, they would say ‘I want three sets of fifteen' instead of ‘give me forty-five'.
I love the big inflated pilates ball. I can sit on it, roll around on it. I think I was deprived of a giant inflated ball as a kid, so now I get to make up for lost time.
If your T-shirt starts to smell before you work out, it's time to throw it away.
I am a nice person. I will talk to anyone who wants to talk to me. But please, if I am lying on a bench and holding two thirty pound dumbbells over my head, I really can't talk to you. Give me two minutes.
Something I love about this new gym is that each cardio machine and treadmill has its own little TV. However, if you shoot wild with your remote, you will hit someone else's screen. Oops.
Reality TV is great fun in the gym. Maybe it's the editing. Trading Spaces is great because you also get cheap interior decorating tips.
CNN is crap. It makes me tense. I keep thinking that any second they're gonna break in with some major devastation. Sure, a major devastation could happen on any channel, but CNN feels like a race horse ready to burst out of the devastation starting gate. Maybe it's the editing.
How do people read while on the cardio machines? I can't focus my eyes on words even when I'm sitting on a stationary bike.
If you're new to the gym thing and feeling a little awkward in the gym environment, don't worry. Everyone is really watching you. They might not look like they are watching you, but they are really watching you. That's okay though. All those well-toned bodies are jealous because you still eat bread.
Yesterday, a guy on the leg press machine asked everyone around him what the Red Sox did yesterday. I said they played baseball.
Is the gym really just an adult playground? Come on, it's fun to hang from your arms and toss balls in the air.
When guys work out together, they talk about women. When girls work out together, they talk about themselves.
I always end my workouts with crunches because you can just lie there on a pretty comfortable mat. No, I'm not resting, I'm stretching.