Yes folks - that is right, I am the self proclaimed Ms. Poopy Pants 2005. You may wonder how can one acquire this title - well it's quite simple really all you need to do is bail on your friends a few times for no real reason other than you are a crabby bitter jaded old lady and well there you have it.
The label "Poopy Pants" started early in 2004 by my dear friend Tisha when I skipped out on some quiz night fun. By summer 2004 the name was only said maybe twice definitely no more than 4 times. By November however the true form of "Poopy Pants" happened when I canceled on a night out at one of our new favorite bars. Tisha proceeds to tell the bartender that I am Miss Poopy Pants and didn't want to come out. Next time I went to the bar the bartender asked me if I was going to open my own place and call it the Poopy Pants Lounge (or PPL for short). Later that week we were at a party and I skipped out early when Tisha and the crew wanted me to hang with them. And keeping with the holiday spirit I didn't go to any holiday parties this year because my eye was on the prize (Ms. Poopy Pants 2005 that is).
What could I do to solidify this prestigious title but cancel on a night out on the EVE of New Years Eve and New Years Eve itself? I stayed home last night and watched Se7en on DEE VEE DEE (also The Apple). I then cleaned out Godzilla's tank, IMed with my brother in law in Iraq, wash/changed my sheets and took a nice long bubble bath. I think it was the best NYE I have had in a long time. So I would like to thank Tisha for the label of Ms. Poopy Pants - I will do my best to uphold this in the coming year. I also want to thank Johnny Depp for being so damn cute, the parents who give their newborns bad names like Yasser, Arafat, ESPN and Tsunami, the bully's who will kick their asses in grade school and Jeebus - because with out him all of this wouldn't be possible.
Oh and my horoscope today is no better than yesterdays.
Kelly's Daily Libra Forecast Quickie: There's no getting around it -- your energy is depleted. Take it easy. Overview: Although one more power struggle could be en route, you're certainly up for it. Besides, it'll all be over soon. You may need to use a secret weapon, but that's just the way of the world. Daily extended (by Astrology.com): Okay, so today could be a bit tricky, especially if you've got a secret you've been trying to hold onto -- and whether it's yours or someone else's doesn't matter at all. Your challenge, thanks to the stars stirring things up in your house of private matters, is to decide if it might not be time to let the cat out of the bag. The good news is that you're verbally adept enough to open that bag without anyone ever realizing it was you who did it.
I seriously think they got a bunch of Debbie Downers to write these horoscopes lately. I use to read them for fun but I think I have to stop if they are going to depress me like this. I have enough going on with the Ms Poopy Pants title I don't think I can take on much more.