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wedding/shower
They might be disengaging from Gaza, but here in Toronto everyone is getting engaged and married. It is the year of the weddings. And the showers.

September is chock-full: 4 weddings.

And I love myself a simcha. And I love the people getting married. But it has got me thinking.

Last night, at Sarah's 30th birthday (there is nothing dirty about 30), Maggie and I talked about how her parents and her friends' parents never even had a ceremony. They were children of the 60's who questioned conventions. And now all their kids are registering at Ashley's and researching games for bridal showers on the internet.

I have been harping on this a lot lately, I hope it is not to the discomfort of my marriage-minded friends. This is not a judgement of any kind. Weddings can be a beautiful thing.

They have just got me thinking about what I believe and what rituals I chose. And maybe one day I will figure out the perfect way to have a fabulous party to celebrate the joyful commitment to the love of my life that does not involve the state or an organized religion.

But so far, we can't even come up with a symbol. The other day, some lady was flirty with kiff, and secretly I got a bit jealous, and I briefly wished he was wearing a wedding band. That night before we fell asleep:

Me: "What about rings? Maybe we could just get rings..."
Kiff: "How do you feel about rings?"
Me: (pause to think) "Kind of like they are someone else's symbol."
Kiff: "Me too."
Me: "How about we get married by a pirate with a mariachi band?"
Kiff: "Like a pirate with a peg leg and an eye patch?"
Me: "Yeah, and a bunch of guys with sombreros and castanets."
Kiff: "On a boat?"
Me: "Sure, why not?"
Kiff: "uh...ok"
Me: "But I also really like this" (arm sweeping gesture to indicate our lives)
Kiff: "Me too. Yup. Just the way it is."

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8.16.2005
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I Loved Your Wedding But Please Stop Telling Us to Get Married

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post #1049
bio: adina
perma-link
8/16/2005
14:22

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