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A few hundred words before a bath
 
 



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post #76
bio: kristen
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5/3/2005
21:50

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The ones about love
The ones about men


Previous Posts
Dutch Ultimatum
The Ludditette
Friday Party #347
The Wizard of Uz
Taking One 4 the Team
Leap and the Net Will Appear

Let me stand next to your fire is on. The water is running for bath.
There is a fire alarm ringing in the building next to mine.

This reminds me of that movie 'unbelievable truth' where adrienne shelley is feebing about nuclear war. The ending is fabulous - where she looks in the sky and says 'they're coming".

Tori Amos: she couldn't choose between the shower or the bath...

I take showers when I'm energetic or in a hurry. I take baths 98% of the time (except when I was in hot, humid south). I choose baby. I choose.

I had another thing I was going to say - something clever I had thought of on the balcony whilst fucking smoking, but 'tis lost for now.

The bells have stopped.



Honestly, dear reader:

I have never had anyone dish it out to me to a degree I would like. To me, it is an honour to dish out. For fuck's sake, I dish it out very forthcomingly to people I like. If I don't like you, I don't take the effort to explain how I see you. What would be the point?

The Lady's comment troubles me. I will try and think of your other comments - the one's that are more in love with me. It's what I want.

My mother once told me that a big problem with us is that we remember the negative 'til our grave, but the positive we file under "how sweet of them to say".

So, I have asked people to dish it to me. I've asked dear friends to tell me what is wrong with me (some have of course said it unrehearsed).

Dreams unwind. Love's a state of mind.

Here is what I've gotten served:

1. You are very judgemental.
2. You expect too much from people.
3. You see the splinter in other people's minds but not the boulder in your own.
4. You are an IDEALIST (this was spewed venomously like a dart from my own mother-in-law) ((she has since kissed my arse and adores my views on the world and fucked-upness and bush)).
5. It's always about you, you, you.

In all honesty, I do try and keep a perspective. I try. Isn't what you think/feel the thing you think is true?

In hitchhiker's guide to said galaxy, a beautiful tool was employed (mark says it wasn't in the original stories) of a 'point-of-view' gun.
I thought it lovely and so something.

I don't know how the robot does it, but it was comforting to hear that the hurt feelings from the Lady were not from the west.

The east I can handle, but the west is all i've got right now.

How does the robot ascertain that? Internet stuff and codes and the like are magic to me. Matty J and rich seem genius to me in their understanding of those mysteries.

Well, nothing more to report.

My life wants some misery. ( a lyric from itunes). Now I have forwarded, and random has chosen "romeo and juliet" by dire straits.

This was a tune that could make me bawl in certain times. The line:
you promised me everything. You promised me thick and thin... now you look at me as if I was just another one of my things. My god, juliet, when we made love you used cry. When are you going to realize that it was just that the time was wrong? when will you try me again? we are perfect for each other, and I dreamed your dream for you, and now your dream is real. How can you look at me as if I was just another one of your things.

I wasn't promised anything, but you know.

I dream of writing just the right thing that will make him love me.



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