New  »   Sunshine Jen  ·  Post-Modern Drunkard  ·  Poop Beetle  ·  Robot Journal  ·  Gator Country
Search...



«« past   |   future »»


Ode to Kent
 
 



comments[2]
all comments

post #107
bio: kristen
perma-link
5/30/2005
07:42

archives
first post
that week
XML/RSS




Category List
The ones about love
The ones about men


Previous Posts
Dutch Ultimatum
The Ludditette
Friday Party #347
The Wizard of Uz
Taking One 4 the Team
Leap and the Net Will Appear

Today Kent turns thirty-four. (it is may 27th at 9:07 am that I am writing this).

I am glad he was born. He is one of my favorite soulmates.

He drives me insane because we play games together. His current one is that he is in zen paradise, and I am a wiggly kid not there yet. I think I'm one of the few people that can call him on stuff. He has been my friend/in my life since I was 18. I have very few people like that (in fact, I can tell you I have kent and mike only).

I didn't send kent a present (i wonder if mark did), but I am going to send him his dictionary. When he was here last september, he noticed that "my" dictionary was actually his and that I had taken it in one of the divorces.

I think that sort of thing is funny and cool.

Kent hated mark. Kent had decided at the time that he was finally finally finally head over heels in love with me. As I've told you before gentle reader, this was beyond ironic- beyond sad - beyond hell.

If he had decided this on my timetable when I was bleeding and bloody and rolling on the floor howling over him - begging the gods to let this thing go - to get my soulmate and love and live.

But as we all know, god only gives us a certain amount of time and then it can't let you live in this pain and you move on. When kent was in love with me finally, this was two years later. I loved him and I pitied him. No one but me could imagine how in pain he was because I didn't love him. I truly understood, and it killed me to cause him such pain. I wanted to love him. I wanted to be in love with him. I wanted my daisies and tripping in the light fantastic.

alas, the dye had been cast the damage is done. (as an aside has anyone seen 'ju du'? It is one of the most beautiful examples of casting dye I've seen).

Kent hated mark. Charlotte had put stickers in marks car - ptouch type things in the windshield. One with 'mark' and one of course 'kristen'.

In my monster-ish-ness, I borrowed kent's car to take mark to the airport for one of his glamorous techie fly-aways to a movie. I couldn't drive mark's stick shift (I CAN drive it, but the anxiety of stalling is so crap - going from neutral to first is a bitch). and my wagoneer hadn't been operational in months. I was poor. I walked to work and groceries. I got into major credit card debt. Dude, I had to survive, I didn't give two shits about chase manhattan's problems.

fools.

Kent hated that car. He was so pissed off at me. I find it touching that he couldn't say no to me. I have a bit of a bewitching power over kent, and it has saddened me that wendy has diminished it... but i understand - you know that.

Kent also couldn't say no to me about ecstasy. That new years eve where the new yorkers and us rented a beachouse and played the 2001 theme for the 3.2.1... happy new year.... we obtained ecstasy. We worked for it as mark and I are both uncomfortable being drug procurers.

We popped our pills (I still think it's funny that matt malloy took the pill without even asking what it was). We had leftovers. Kent was scared and of course mike does whatever kent says/does. I pulled the card. I knew I could. I had taken ecstasy once and KNEW that Kent would like it - that it would change his life. I know him. I used the 'do this for me... all the pain you caused me... all we've been through - take this one little pill. i promise you won't get a heart attack. do it. do it. kent, I will not rest until you take that pill".

He did. Mike did. It was a life-changing night for them - for all of us (of course mike went a bit overboard with the ecstasy binge - but he's very habitual and quite good at procuring drugs.)

Now kent likes mark more than he likes me. I write kent, no response. He thinks of mark as his funk soul brother. He admires mark. he loves mark. He thinks I'm a fool and a wiggly matchbox kid.

Happy Birthday Kent you sanctimonious, superiority-complexed soulmate.



«« past   |   future »»