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post #455
bio: jen

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Ozzing on the Treadmill

Yesterday, while running on the treadmill at the gym, I ended up watching the Dr. Oz Show.

Yesterday, my treadmill television options were limited since baseball was on hiatus. I could watch local news, Dr. Phil, or Dr. Oz. Since I can not stand the sound of Dr. Phil’s voice, I went to the land of Oz.

By the way, for my Australian readership, I do look at Dr. Oz’s name and sometimes think Dr. Australia. Then I think happy thoughts because thinking about Australia makes me happy. Then I think of swarms of mossies and my happiness dwindles a bit, but I still have that goofy grin on my face. Ahhh. Australia. Okay. Moving on.

The Dr. Oz Show opens with Dr. Oz, not in scrubs, walking the streets of a city. He’s a walking guy. He’s a man of the people. He starts on walk. He finishes on don’t walk. Then we see Dr. Oz in his Oprah-esque studio with his audience behind him. He wears a purple shirt.

Today, we’re going to talk about sex in America. Dr. Oz announces, and I think, this could be better than baseball.

I’ll spare you any suspense. It wasn’t.

Still, I had fifteen minutes to go on the treadmill.

The show began with results from a survey of 22,000 Americans in which really provocative and intimate questions were asked. For example, would you rather eat or have sex? Okayyyy. We saw footage of women on the street giggling and writing on clipboards. One woman admitted that her fantasy was Jay Z and George Clooney. When asked if she meant at the same time, her answer was in the negative.

Then there were two blonde female doctors who had written books and claimed expert status. Actually, they seemed to be intelligent but their discourse was all bullet points and lingerie. They were obviously only speaking to an audience of monogamous heterosexual couples or even more specifically, housewives living on cul de sacs.

Around the first commercial break, I was done on the treadmill, so I missed the rest of the episode. The positive angelic part of me hoped that Dr. Oz did help some people with his sex episode because sex is a really awesome thing. The thinking side of me wondered if the role of sex in mass culture was addressed, and how do feelings of inadequacy brought on by unreal sexual imagery translate into intimacy. Stuff like that.

Yeah, I can see Jay Z and George Clooney at the same time. Yeah, that would be nice. . .until the mossies start swarming. Then again, that’s when it might start to get very interesting.

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