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The Stories...
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Love Stinks. Sometimes we get dumped.
: submit your own
I Was Dumper AND Dumpee
by kittenpants
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If I can offer any advice to young men out there, it would be "grow some balls" (metaphorically speaking). No girl is going to fall apart if you stop dating her. Most likely she'll get drunk with her friends, talk shit about you for a few hours, and get over it. Don't be that pussy guy who wants to break up with her, but can't do it, so instead he acts like an asshole until she breaks up with him.
I dated that guy (haven't we all?) in college. I realized at some point that he was no longer into me. But it took a while. I was all too ready to believe his excuses for not being able to see me; the "I'm not feeling well," and, "I have band practice" and "I think I have mono." But I finally admitted to myself that those were all lies, and it made me angry. Why wouldn't he just tell me the truth? I wasn't some sort of psychotic nutjob with a history of burning down buildings over a little bad news. Here I had been concerned about his health and his band, when instead, I could have spent my time making out with new guys in different bands.
So I resolved to play dumb. I was going to FORCE him to break up with me. I would pretend everything was fine until he was so tired of ignoring me, avoiding me, and treating me like crap that he broke down and broke it off for good. And that's precisely what I did. I sucked up humiliation after humilation in front of his friends and mine, and pretended to be completely blind to the obvious.
Until I had enough. I was overwhelmed. I committed a tiny indiscretion one night after he had been particularly mean to me. I felt guilty about it. I figured this had gone on long enough and I would have to be the bigger person and let him off the hook.
So I showed up at his house before class and tried to wake him up so we could talk, and I could let him know he won. But the cherry on this shit sundae was, he couldn't even be bothered. He just rolled over and mumbled "sleeping." and refused to be woken up.
I was irate. I wrote a note. A NOTE! I had to break up with myself in a note. It was extra-humiliating--straight out of seventh grade. I was so horrified to have to break up with me (for him), with the added "fuck you," that the evidence would exist forever on paper.
I ran into him later that day and he cast the most heartbroken look in my direction. Like I had really hurt him by breaking things off. That was even more maddening; what the fuck?!!!. I found out years later it was actually the look of guilt, and I received the best apology ever given. It's been over a decade, and we have since become friends.
I've seen the way you boys turn into cowards around the opposite sex, both when you attempt to date and attempt to dump. I don't know; maybe I need to stop hanging out with musicians. In the meantime, please, please stop being so afraid to level with the ladies. We're not all going to go all "Melrose-Place," you know? And when we get wise to your master plan, we are going to write about it on the internet for years. We may forgive, but we never forget.
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