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  • becker
    CBS
    by tamara

    Do you ever wonder if God hates you? It's a safe bet that if you've had to watch "Becker" twice in two weeks like me, he/she/it does. And what a righteous smiting it is. If anything bad happens to me today, you can bet it's from this darned Curse Of Becker that's now on me (which can last up to an entire week until the airing of another evil episode breaks the current episode's spell). Believe me, it's that bad. (Picture voiceover over a promo for it: "Tamara Federici of happyrobot calls it soul-crumblingly bad!")


    Oh, CBS. Why must you mistake "surly" for"funny"?


    I'm sure they tried to sell this as: "He's like Archie Bunker a grouch, but we love 'em". (As far as grouches go - how much would I give to see a sitcom based around Oscar the Grouch instead of "Becker"? I can see it now it's on the WB, it's called "Grouchville", and it's Oscar and a bunch of hot teens who go to NYU and live in the apartment next to his trashcan.)


    Becker, played by Ted Danson (I never get tired of him!) is a doctor who has friends at a diner, and has some employees at his office. And that's it. "Blues Clues" is looking better and better....


    The storeowner, the ditzy one, the black lady, the New York stereotype and ol' blondie sure do have some good times with Becker, though. They do have names, but it's better that I leave them as stereotypes here because this is the only way they are memorable. (I have a worksheet that tells me their names at work, and I still prefer to use the generalized names.) Becker's deal is that he is a pessimist, and believes everyone he meets is trying to scam him in some way, and the supporting cast plays off of that. Watching these folks interact reminds me of that time I hung out with people I didn't really care that much about, and talked about something really vague for twenty-two minutes. That was a good time.


    So, which episode do you want to hear about? The one where Becker teaches kids about sex instead of giving a lesson on nutrition, and some blind jokes are made? Or the one about Becker getting an article published next to a picture of a hideous man people think is him, and some more blind jokes?


    Certainly, I don't fault them for having a lead with a negative outlook. But I do fault them for giving me a show so bad that I'd rather watch a string of those "Can you hear me now?" Verizon commercials with that "Carson Daly with glasses" guy than ever watch "Becker" again. No, wait - yeah, I would.


    Peace be with you, and may the Curse of Becker not darken your set.